Why I Decided to Self-Publish
Full disclosure, this isn’t a blog post discussing the pros and cons of self-publishing versus traditional publishing. That may come later, but for now, please enjoy a rambling walkthrough of my decision to self-publish.
I Wrote a Book and Shelved It
I wrote a book in high school and my early college days. I worked on it with dedicated critique partners and even had query critiques with several agents. I sent out a few queries, but ultimately decided to shelve the book, as I felt it was problematic and in need of too much work to salvage.
I Wrote a Book I Didn’t Want to Shelve
The Way of the Cicadas is my second book. I fell in love with the characters and, with the help of some amazing critique partners, created a story I really believed in.
I had started a YouTube channel and upped my social media presence in the high of finishing The Way of the Cicadas and being so sure I would get an agent and a book deal.
Let me introduce you to the video that thoroughly crushed those dreams: Alexa Donne discussing sci-fi in YA. Essentially, according to Publishing, YA is geared toward girls (why?), and they believe girls don’t read sci-fi (excuse me?). Alexa managed to publish in a short space opera bubble and has since shifted to thrillers. Post-apocalyptic bubbles had come and gone while I was busy making my book the best it could be. Now YA imprints are shutting down and agents and editors are leaving right and left.
After I realized how unlikely it was that I would find a literary agent with this type of work, I begrudgingly shelved it and forced myself to write the next book. I still had to make content. I still had to enter pitch contests and have something for my critique partners. I’d already shelved one book, so what was another?
I Wrote Book #3
And I did it. I got 60,000 words on the page. But they weren’t right. The quick draft I spun together had none of the lyricism of my first two books. It had characters who were puppets to a plot. I stopped writing fiction. For about two years.
Life Is Short
Demoralized by fiction, I threw myself into copy writing because I got positive feedback and was paid for my work, which felt so refreshing I got tearful. I found that I enjoyed writing about anything and everything, and that I was good at it.
I quit my job in publishing and got a full-time job as a copy writer. Being able to support myself with my writing stitched the shreds of my confidence back together. And living through a few historical events can teach you a bit about what actually matters. Over time, I realized that having the prestige of a book deal doesn’t matter. Sharing my story with as many people as possible does.
Post-apocalyptic Never Goes Out of Style
I’m always on the lookout for a good post-apocalyptic book, and I know others are too. People were doom and gloom (ha ha) about the genre because of the alarming events of 2020. But I was taking more comfort from post-apocalyptic media than ever, and I know I’m not the only one.
I still believe in book #3, but it needs a lot of work that I could not find the motivation to complete when I was still grieving for a book I never wanted to shelve in the first place.
I decided to publish The Way of the Cicadas as an adult book for a few reasons. I’ll get into that in a future blog post, but the gist is that it always had crossover potential and I believe it will do better as an adult book in self-publishing channels.
Publishing The Way of the Cicadas Was How I Could Move On
The thought of self-publishing The Way of the Cicadas myself was the only thing that made me want to do any of this again. So here goes nothing.